Bank of Southend, embargo embraced and more….
But Southend fans are in dismay, because under new government subsidy take-over conditions, United would need to be re-classified as a bank.
Supporters will need to apply for match tickets, but will be refused if they have outstanding debts or a bad credit rating.
Want-away owner Mike Ashley has conceded defeat in his attempts to offload Newcastle United by stating his intentions to turn the club around, at least until he gets disheartened and changes his mind.
As the fair-weather owner revels in the joy of being top of the league, he has forced Chris Hughton into taking the job he has always dreaded, the permanent manager position.
Portsmouth fans are rejoicing about the news that the club has been restricted with a transfer embargo.
After Pompey’s transfer committee sanctioned some woeful summer signings, supporters took to the streets to celebrate the thought of not acquiring any more rough-tackling defensive midfielders, lower-division wingers or battering-ram strikers.
– The Dirty Tackle Press is a satirical football parody and contains no true facts whatsoever –